An embarrassed Sheriff Gary Painter fired one Midland County deputy and suspended three others without pay after a scantily dressed waitress holding a rifle posed for photographs on the hood of a patrol vehicle. [More]Now hold the damn phone here a second--the "Only Ones" magical "patrol rifle" juju is so powerful that one given to a ("Twin Peaks"!) pseudo-Hooters gal by DUI-eligible boobs with badges is a mere "rifle", but if you or I have one while we're stone cold sober it would instantly become a "semiautomatic mass killing machine"...?
[Via Matt S]